Let Down at the CoinStar

[Gobirds66]

The other night I was at the grocery store with the wife. I always go in for the one small ray of happiness that I can get from an hour of trolling the isles for food. I get to walk by the CoinStar Machine and check for some rejected coins! Yeah, I am sad, I know. But, it is winter and the motorcycle is in the garage. Cannot really ride in the snow and ice, and it is not Thursday when I get to pick up my new batch of coins, so I am really grasping for something fun. I could stay in the car and play Angry Birds but then I would not get to check the coin return at the CoinStar.....and I found silver in it before, so there is always hope. So, I wind my way through more kinds of pasta, veggies, and yogurt than any man can want, listening to how my wife wants to cook with new ingredients I never even heard of in the past. Now that we got meat and ice cream, I know we are soon done.....can't let the ice cream melt!

I bag the groceries, pay, and then the moment comes. There it is, in all her glory. Radiating that awesome flourescent light that I love so. Her dump bin is so clean and inviting. You know her belly is full with coin. Maybe, just maybe there is a rejected coin for me. I feel like a kid on Easter morning.....hoping to find the golden egg! As we go by, I get into position. I have perfected the one handed dip and sweep to minimize my time in the return. You do not want others to see you checking. Not because you are embarrassed, but because you don't want them to get your coins!

I am on my game. The cart rolls up. I always get a big cart when we go into the store even if we just get one thing. I get maximum blockage as I stroll by. My cart will get to the CoinStar first keeping others from my coins. Yes, the front of the cart passes in front of the machine. I have successfully controlled the space. Whatever is in there is MINE....ALL MINE!!!!! I do not break stride. I make sure my steps put my left foot in front of the change return bin so I can dip to my right all in stride. I bend down, and my hand knows the way. I do not even need to look. It is automatic at this point. As my hand goes in.....I feel it. It slides around a bit. I gain control of it. It feels like a dime. Time for extraction. I have it in my hand, my hand is free and no one but the little old lady saw me do it and she is not telling. Score.

Now, you just cannot open your hand and look. No. Someone might see you. so, I put my hand in my right pocket. This pocket is reserved for my keys only so no coins ever go in there. My find is isolated and secured. OK, now I have to escape. As we walk out the door, it appears to be a clean getaway. I am not in the car yet. I cannot look for fear of dropping it. So I wait for what seems to be a long walk to the car. If it was a minute, it felt like an hour. My wife's head is still shaking. She cannot believe me. I am such a clod to her. "You and your crazy coins," she says. I tell her to hush up. You never know who wants the treasure you now have in your pocket. It is all about security at this point. She bought $200 worth of groceries. Does anyone know how long that takes to load in a car? Forever is a good start. Finally, they are loaded, I take the cart back to the cart corral. Must act normally. Nothing to see here.

I make it back to the car. I get in and lock the doors. Wife is still laughing at me. I am doing this all for her I say to myself. Why does she not appreciate it? With the doors locked, I pull away and drive home at a nice calm speed. No one followed me! That is good. The coin is burning a hole in my jeans. It is killing me. I gotta know. Was it a Merc? A Roosie? Silver Canadian? We finally pull into the driveway, I grab bags and run into the house. Down in the basement, where there are no windows, I will finally get to know. I dig deep. I feel it. I pull it out.

It is a Roosie! Yeah! It is really brown and dirty, but a Roosie none the less. I scored! The CoinStar gave it up! It is all mine. I can take over the world now..... Wonder what year so I can add it to my spreadsheet.....

196........7! What? I got duped. It is not supposed to kick out the clad.....Just the silver. Damn you CoinStar! You will give up silver again, and when you do, I will be there!

[Market Harmony]

[dakota1955]

[beauanderos]

well done

[Verbane]

[TwoAndAHalfCents]

One must first check the CoinStar machine upon entering the store. After an extended period of time wandering the aisles one must then check the CoinStar machine again upon exiting the store in case another batch of coins has been dumped in the machine dislodging the silver dime that had not yet dropped as of the first check.

[johnbrickner]

An excellent read. Plz write a book, I was captivated.

[fasteddy]

that was fun, thanks

[Morsecode]

I thought for a minute I was reading about myself

Tell your wife you have important business in Connecticut, and I'll take you on a twelve stop bank robbing run. I require someone with your stealth.

[Diggin4copper]

Nice story.. here is mine.. I slipped into the front lobby of one of my dump banks today. Its clear all around the coin machine.. Step up and deftly slip a finger under the magnets and free up 1 Canadian nickle. run the coins and clear the magnet again, and that's it, 1 measly nickle.. this counter is usually good for a couple Canadian quarters.. oh well... Now it gets good..while standing in line to cash out my ticket, There, on a ledge, a couple feet from the coin machine are two coins someone placed for the taking, They must be goodies, right?....Score! All I have to do is cash out,walk by and swoop them into my hand as I walk out. 2nd in line, all looks good... oh oh... a woman comes in and goes to the coin machine.. right between me and the coins on the ledge. She is running a cup of coins... Im now next in line... AAAAAH how do I stall...Then I hear.." May I help the next person?" AHHH!! I shuffle over to the teller, and cash out my ticket... I turn to leave, she is done and walking away! I do the old swoop and slip, and the coins are in my pocket! Out the door, into the truck and down the street. One has an octagon shape... a 1982 twenty pence from England! Thats a new one.. and a Bermuda 25 cent piece.. A good day after all in the foreign coin dept...

[dannan14]

Great story....i think i was as disappointed as you were by the ending

[J_Dodge]

Great story....i think i was as disappointed as you were by the ending

Nah - greate story - and the ending was perfect - it's reflects reality - real life. I can relate to that - it's the kind of sucess
I have at the coin machines.

JD

[Gobirds66]

One must first check the CoinStar machine upon entering the store. After an extended period of time wandering the aisles one must then check the CoinStar machine again upon exiting the store in case another batch of coins has been dumped in the machine dislodging the silver dime that had not yet dropped as of the first check.

This is hard for me to do. The location of the CoinStar makes it difficult to do it on entrance. It would be too obvious for me, and the wife.....well she would not allow me to check twice! I get my one shot! That is all. I make the most of it though. I will have to post my coin counter stories soon. Now there is where I get some wild things happening.....

[Zincanator]

Very talented author, bravo! Encore!! ENCORE [throws roses on the stage]!!!

Oh and don't forget to check the return trays at the self-checkouts. I found three crispy one-dollar bills the other night.

[Gobirds66]

Very talented author, bravo! Encore!! ENCORE [throws roses on the stage]!!!

Oh and don't forget to check the return trays at the self-checkouts. I found three crispy one-dollar bills the other night.

Oh, I do that all the time. It is a great money maker! I am always finding coin, and occasionally dollars. People forget the bills more than you think. Wife tells me I need to turn it in to which I reply that when I find a guy named Washington that looks the guy in the picture, I will know it is his bill and return it.....other than that, no one can prove it is was their bill other than the Federal Government and I already give enough back to them so I am keeping this one! She usually just shakes her head.....

[dannan14]

Great story....i think i was as disappointed as you were by the ending

Nah - greate story - and the ending was perfect - it's reflects reality - real life. I can relate to that - it's the kind of sucess
I have at the coin machines.

JD

i think we actually agree...disappointment is a part of life...i tend to celebrate the downs almost as much as the ups....i'm just a little grumpier during the down parts.

[TheJonasCollegeFund]

Ha......sounds like a metal detecting clad. I have quite a few clad dimes and quarters that the machine just won't take. They are brownish red and looking a bit corroded.

Anyway, I always hit the coinstar when I shop. I kinda do what you do. Funny stuff.

Nice read!

[Numis Pam]

OMGoodness! This was quite captivating!!!
Please tell us about more of your finds.